Saturday, June 27, 2015

For the Love of Traditional Marriage


In the wake of the SCOTUS decision on marriage, I felt I needed to say something. Honestly, I was afraid, since my views are not celebrated in profile pics and catchy memes. I have many Facebook friends whom I love and don't wish to offend but I also know that I should not let that silence me, nor would they want me to be silent.

I think what saddens me most is the view that because I don't agree with the principle of gay marriage that I must hate gay people and that's absolutely not true. As most of you know I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormon) and most of my views are based on my belief in my church and the gospel of Christ.  What I have been taught my whole life in church, and what I believe with all my heart is that God loves all of us and wants all of us to have joy and to return to him by living his principles.  We all memorized John 3:16 "For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son,...". We are also taught that we are to follow Christ's teachings to "Love one another, as I have Loved you" (John 13:34) and to "Judge not that ye be not judged" (Matt. 7:1).

Of the principles that God has given us, marriage between a man and a woman is one of the most important ones that if we follow it faithfully and righteously, will lead us to real joy and to return to our Father in Heaven. It is an integral part of His great Plan of Salvation for each of us. And there is a specific reason why He says that marriage should be between a man and a woman. 




Only in that union can a family be created and children raised with the proper balance and complementary nature that a man and a woman can provide. Men and women have different strengths. God created us that way for a purpose, that being to join together as Yin and Yang to work together and lean on each others' strengths to overcome our own weaknesses. The Family: A Proclamation to the World, written and distributed to many leaders of the world by the First Presidency of the Church explained it: "ALL HUMAN BEINGS—male and female—are created in the image of God. Each is a beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents, and, as such, each has a divine nature and destiny. Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose."

President Henry B. Eyring of the First Presidency of the LDS church recently spoke at an international, interreligious colloquium about the value of traditional marriage and talked about his complementary relationship with his wife:
"Our differences combined as if they were designed to create a better whole. Rather than dividing us, our differences bound us together. Above all, our unique abilities allowed us to become partners with God in creating human life. The happiness that came from our becoming one built faith in our children and grandchildren that marriage could be a continuing source of satisfaction for them and their families."


Of course, this is the ideal and so often, in this world, the ideal doesn't seem to be reality. We are plagued with divorce, infidelity in marriage, a parent forced to raise a child on their own and other variations that weaken marriage and family. And generally, most agree that these things do no good for families or society. But, just because these things have afflicted our culture and the family, doesn't mean that the ideal isn't still out there. It doesn't mean that I shouldn't speak up for what I believe God has said is the ideal. 

Elder Neil L. Anderson, member of the LDS Quorum of the Twelve said:  "While many governments and well-meaning individuals have redefined marriage, the Lord has not. In the very beginning, God initiated marriage between a man and a woman—Adam and Eve. He designated the purposes of marriage to go far beyond the personal satisfaction and fulfillment of adults to, more importantly, advancing the ideal setting for children to be born, reared, and nurtured. Families are the treasure of heaven." (Elder Neil L. Anderson, "Spiritual Whirlwinds", Apr. 2014 General Conference)

I don't wish to denigrate or hurt those who feel differently or who are attracted to or in love with someone of the same gender. Nor do I want to take away anyone's rights. I firmly believe that you should be able to have anyone you want as a beneficiary on your benefits or inheritances. You should have anyone you want by your side in a hospital. You should be able to claim anyone on your taxes as your legal companion. You should be able to spend your life with whomever you choose. This is all free agency which is another critical principle of the gospel. 2 Nephi 2:16 says: "Wherefore, the Lord gave unto man that he should act for himself".  Doctrine and Covenants 58:28 also says: "For the power is in them, wherein they are agents unto themselves." 

I simply wish to, as a Facebook friend posted today, promote the things I love, rather than bash what I don't agree with.  In the very loud commotion celebrating the decision by SCOTUS, I want to add my voice for the value of the ideal of traditional marriage.